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  • Writer's pictureMia Rose

A Little Spontaneity Never Hurt

I had a moment last week. A moment that just felt right. It felt free, fun and completely random. It started as a typical day of juggling work and getting my kids to their various practices, activities, what have you. It was so nice out that they had just a little bit of time to squeeze in some outside play.. Just play. No coaches, instructors, games, just good old kids playing in the backyard kind of fun. My oldest is probably the child who is scheduled to the max, so watching her laugh and play with her brothers and the neighbor kids was such a pleasant sight! Unfortunately, she has so many allergies and asthma issues that Spring time isn't really her best friend. It was time for me to take her to her two hour weekly gymnastics class which is about a 30 minute drive away. As we were driving, she started itching her arm which was, of course, reacting to something she came in contact with while playing outside. The itching turned into a rash, which turned into her saying how much it hurt, which turned into tears. We pulled into the parking lot of the gymnastics academy and I took a look. She was definitely reacting to something and I could tell it bothered her, but my motherly instinct initially, was of the "Come on! You've got this. Chin up and let's get in for class!" variety. You know, the cheerleader mom who is encouraging her child when really in my head I'm thinking.... we pay so much for this and you need to suck it up and realize that when you commit to something you do it....Can I get an Amen?!? haha! She kept crying and pushing back against my "rah, rah" attempts that I finally just said, "You know what? Forget it. Let's just go see a movie". I'm pretty sure my daughter's chin fell to the floor. I really don't think I've been that mom. The one to let her out of something. I'm usually the scheduled, routine oriented mom who gets the kids where then need to be, when they need to be there. I'm the mom who encourages them to fight through difficult moments and give it all you've got even if you're tired, sore or just not feeling it, kind of mom. In this particular moment, however, I just felt tired. I felt like I couldn't really coach her through the adversity because maybe deep down I was feeling pretty damn spent, too. After really analyzing the moment, maybe I know all too well how sometimes we just need a damn break. Yes, it's important to learn and grow from situations that are difficult and let your perseverance take over, but sometimes when it's just too much, you really do need to fuel your soul, too. Self love requires you to keep that spark of joy lit and enjoy living! Being over worked, over tired and uninspired is no way to live. I know this firsthand. I can honestly say that I didn't think this reaction through or over analyze it after I said let's do something else. I just went with it! It was completely spontaneous and completely fun. And completely right in that moment. We went to a movie that my daughter had been wanting to see, but surprise, surprise we'd been too busy to get to. As we were sitting in the recliners, about half way through the movie, I looked over at my daughter and saw her beautiful smile. The movie was actually kind of a tear jerker, which thankfully made the tears running down my cheeks just blend in with everyone else's. My tears were because I was happy, grateful and so present in this time with a very special person in my life. My hope from this experience is this... if something were to happen to me and I am no longer here, my hope is that she remembers that moment. That carefree, spontaneous moment that brought so much joy to each of us that we couldn't help but smile and feel so at peace and so alive together. I hope she remembers me as not just a mom taking her from activity to activity, but a woman who knew the value of taking time to enjoy this precious life that we have when everything around us is telling us we just need time to breathe. I hope she always takes time for herself. I hope she understands that while obligations and appointments and challenging moments are important to work through, it is also important to live. It's important to acknowledge when you need some time off and to take it. When we got in the car after the movie, with a great big smile, she said "Mom, that was so much fun!". Mission accomplished. We went about the rest of our week back on track. Getting to practices and appointments without any disruption. Life went on...but I'm certain she won't forget this spontaneous gift of a girl's night out, because I know I never will.-M

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